i have a fat fuck gray cat named Amber. She's kind of a retard. I clean the litter every other day and yet I keep finding her squating in random places and leaving little drops of piss. It's never a full piss, just little drops. So tonight I chased her down and threw across the room, she went crashing through the child gate. I feel great.
Does anyone have any advice so I don't throw this fucking idiot across the room and out the door?

She's too fucking stupid (all cats are) to associate being thrown across the room with peeing on the floor, you're going to have to spray her with water while she's in the act.

You threw your cat across the room and felt great about it? Hang yourself.

But you probably wont do that, and I probably can't do it for you, so here's some advice so that you can cut the animal abuse right here.

1. Cats will do this when they are distressed. Cats get distressed when there is a major change in their routine - routines are what give them a feeling of safety.
2. Cats will not piss in a litter box if the texture of the litter is awkward to them. Generally, the finer and less dusty the litter, the better. If you've switched her litter lately, this is your problem.
3. If your cat is young and un-spayed, she may be doing this out of a natural desire to mate, using her piss to spread her pheromones.
4. Your cat could be sick, specifically with a UTI. You may want to get her checked by a vet.
5. Females mark territory with piss far less than males, but if there are other cats in the area, she may be able to sense them and she's taking the territorial behavior to an extreme. If this is the case, you're shit out of luck. She'll grow out of it eventually.

the whole I feel great thing was sarcastic, I'm upset with myself. Been under alot of stress lately and kitty took the brunt. It wasn't a full force throw, anyways.

1.no routine change
2. no litter change
3 she's fixed
4.possible UTI
5. we got her and Lucky at the same time, so no on this

can't afford a vet right now, wife just got her appendix out and will be out of work for a while, it was perforated.

BAH!! fuck